{"id":17115,"date":"2017-06-22T13:41:57","date_gmt":"2017-06-22T11:41:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/?p=17115"},"modified":"2018-02-07T10:18:26","modified_gmt":"2018-02-07T09:18:26","slug":"linking-and-building-to-successfully-influence-others","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/de\/linking-and-building-to-successfully-influence-others\/","title":{"rendered":"Linking and building to successfully influence others"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>In today\u2019s business world of cross-functional initiatives, matrix structures and virtual teams, the ability to influence others is becoming even more essential if you want to succeed. <\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/hbr.org\/2012\/01\/whats-your-influencing-style\">And no matter what your influencing style is<\/a><strong>, to effectively influence somebody you need to connect with them. <\/strong>I<strong>f you\u2019re trying to influence somebody it means that you have differing opinions and ideas. One of the simplest ways to influence somebody is by &#8222;linking and building&#8220;: Find and focus on the agreement \u2026 and then build on this. <\/strong><strong>Most people are open to sharing and discussing their opinions and ideas \u2013 and most of us are aware that our ideas are not the only ones valid. What we want is to be taken seriously and feel listened to.\u00a0 This is where \u201clinking\u201d comes in \u2013 if you link your ideas to their ideas it clearly shows you have listened to and understood their thoughts and feelings.\u00a0 And when you build on somebody\u2019s ideas it means you are validating their contributions. \u00a0This builds rapport and relationships WHICH then makes the process of influencing so much easier..<em>.<\/em><\/strong><br \/>\n<!--HubSpot Call-to-Action Code --><span id=\"hs-cta-wrapper-eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\" class=\"hs-cta-wrapper\"><span id=\"hs-cta-eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\" class=\"hs-cta-node hs-cta-eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\"><!-- [if lte IE 8]>\n\n\n<div id=\"hs-cta-ie-element\"><\/div>\n\n\n<![endif]--><a href=\"https:\/\/cta-redirect.hubspot.com\/cta\/redirect\/455190\/eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img decoding=\"async\" id=\"hs-cta-img-eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\" class=\"hs-cta-img lazyload\" style=\"border-width: 0px;\" data-src=\"https:\/\/no-cache.hubspot.com\/cta\/default\/455190\/eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56.png\" alt=\"The big (free) eBook of negotiations language\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" id=\"hs-cta-img-eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56\" class=\"hs-cta-img\" style=\"border-width: 0px;\" src=\"https:\/\/no-cache.hubspot.com\/cta\/default\/455190\/eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56.png\" alt=\"The big (free) eBook of negotiations language\" \/><\/noscript><\/a><\/span><script charset=\"utf-8\" src=\"https:\/\/js.hscta.net\/cta\/current.js\"><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\"> hbspt.cta.load(455190, 'eac6a883-282f-4df0-a3a5-3bdfa9851c56', {}); <\/script><\/span><!-- end HubSpot Call-to-Action Code --><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h2><strong>\u00a0<\/strong>5 things to keep in mind<\/h2>\n<h4>1. Is the link already there?<\/h4>\n<p>Do you just need to draw their attention to it? Or will you need to build the link step by step? If so you need to find some common ground \u2013 this could be a shared goal, a previous experience or perhaps the two of you are seeing the same current challenges? \u00a0Open questions like <em>\u201cWhere do you think we need to go?\u201d <\/em>or <em>\u201cWhat are your thoughts?\u201d<\/em> work well here \u2026<\/p>\n<h4>2. When you find your \u201clink\u201d, be explicit about what you like \/ share about their views, opinion, drives etc.<\/h4>\n<p>For example. <em>\u201cIt\u2019s clear to me that we both want to make sure any changes we make don\u2019t cost people more time<\/em>\u201d or \u201c<em>What I really like about your approach is that you\u2019re considering the end-user first. I feel the same way\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<h4>3. Focus on positives and use positive language.<\/h4>\n<p>Most people are very rarely completely wrong, just as you are very rarely completely right.\u00a0 Understanding this means that it is always possible to approach something by looking for the \u201cright\u201d ideas e.g.<em> \u201cWhat I like about your suggestion is \u2026<\/em>\u201d thereby creating a positive spiral and rapport \u2013 as opposed to focusing on what you don\u2019t like e.g.<em> \u201c I can\u2019t imagine this working\u201d<\/em> thereby creating a downwards negative spiral <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Practice-Creativity-Manual-Dynamic-Problem-Solving\/dp\/0963878484\">(source &#8211;<em> George Prince \u2013 The Practice of Creativity).<\/em><\/a><em><br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n<h4>4. There are going to be differences.<\/h4>\n<p>If there weren\u2019t you wouldn\u2019t be trying to influence each other! But make an effort to delay focusing on differences until some bridges have been built. When you turn to them, link back to the shared elements you\u2019ve found and be explicit about your reasons. \u201c<em>It seems that we agree on the causes of the problem and we have different ideas about what needs doing. Why do you think this is?\u201d<\/em> Don\u2019t assume the everything is obvious!<\/p>\n<h4>5. As you progress do continually clarify.<\/h4>\n<p>Use language like <em>\u201cSo what you\u2019re saying is \u2026\u201d<\/em> and <em>\u201cLet me just check I\u2019m understanding you \u2026 \u201c<\/em>. This shows your understanding of their views, ideas and thoughts AND actually ensures you do actually understand. Build your bridge on concrete foundations.<\/p>\n<p>Linking and building is just one of many <a href=\"https:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/item\/influencing-skills-seminar\/\">practical techniques from our influencing seminars <\/a>that can help you successfully influence others. And it starts with getting all parties to face in the same direction. Please contact if you&#8217;d like to know more.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In today\u2019s business world of cross-functional initiatives, matrix structures and virtual teams, the ability to influence others is becoming even more essential if you want to succeed. And no matter what your influencing style is, to effectively influence somebody you need to connect with them. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":16879,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"content-type":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[94,92],"tags":[115,113],"class_list":["post-17115","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-hybrid-solutions","category-soft-skills-pathway","tag-influencing","tag-managing-conflict"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Linking and building to successfully influence others | Target Training GmbH<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/de\/linking-and-building-to-successfully-influence-others\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"de_DE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Linking and building to successfully influence others | Target Training GmbH\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In today\u2019s business world of cross-functional initiatives, matrix structures and virtual teams, the ability to influence others is becoming even more essential if you want to succeed. 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