{"id":30727,"date":"2019-08-10T13:15:07","date_gmt":"2019-08-10T11:15:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/?p=30727"},"modified":"2020-07-01T14:45:42","modified_gmt":"2020-07-01T12:45:42","slug":"balancing-your-emotional-bank-accounts-practical-activities-for-managers-and-leaders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.targettraining.eu\/de\/balancing-your-emotional-bank-accounts-practical-activities-for-managers-and-leaders\/","title":{"rendered":"Balancing your emotional bank accounts\u00a0– practical activities for managers and leaders"},"content":{"rendered":"

In our previous blog we explained <\/strong>what an emotional bank account is and why managers need to care about building them<\/a> . To quickly recap, an emotional bank account is a metaphor coined by Stephen Covey in his book <\/strong>The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.<\/a> It describes the amount of trust that\u2019s been built up in a relationship, and when trust is high, communication is easy and effective. Every time a manager says something supportive, shows respect, helps somebody with a difficult situation, etc., they make a deposit in that person\u2019s emotional bank account.\u00a0 Every time they criticize, blame, lie, intimidate, etc., they make a withdrawal.\u00a0 Over time, the effects of these deposits will help transform that relationship. This post goes deeper into how to build your emotional bank accounts.<\/strong><\/p>\n

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How do you build a healthy emotional bank account with your team?<\/h2>\n

Every manager and team are different, and culture can play a part, but at the end of the day it comes back to our relationships and how we behave. Covey identified six ways to make deposits (or reduce withdrawals):<\/p>\n

1) Understand the individual<\/h4>\n

You need to know what the individual wants and what constitutes a deposit and withdrawal for them.\u00a0 Whereas one employee might be exhilarated by presenting their project results to the board another may prefer to be in the background and their contribution acknowledged privately.\u00a0 Ask yourself what drives them? How do they want recognition? What makes their eyes light up?<\/p>\n

2) Keeping commitments<\/h4>\n

We have all broken a promise and let somebody down, and when we do this, we are making a withdrawal.\u00a0 Keeping commitments is about doing what we say we\u2019ll do, keeping our promises, delivering what we said we\u2019d deliver, being on time, being where we should be, fulfilling our promises. If you consistently keep your commitments, you build healthy emotional bank accounts with people.<\/p>\n

3) Clarifying expectations<\/h4>\n

Each of us have different backgrounds, experiences and expectations. We see the world differently.\u00a0 Clarifying understanding and expectations is essential if you\u2019d like to minimize misunderstanding and wrong assumptions. By proactively investing time in clarifying expectations and building a\u00a0 mutual understanding of what you need, don\u2019t need, want, don\u2019t want etc you can minimize the \u201c I thought that..\u201d, \u201cI\u2019d assumed ..\u201d, \u201cTo me it was obvious that \u2026\u201d.\u00a0 <\/em>And keep in mind that if you are leading people and teams virtually<\/a>, then the risk of false assumptions and misunderstanding does increase, and formalizing things with communication charters does help.<\/p>\n

4) Attending to the little things<\/h4>\n

Relationships aren\u2019t only built by big moments but by the little things too. These are the smiles in the corridor, holding the door open, short thank you emails, remembering their daughter has just started school, not heading straight to your office but spending a moment walking through the open office to be seen. Kind words, smiles, courtesies, warmth. Human interest, and taking time when you don\u2019t have to.<\/p>\n

5) Showing personal integrity<\/h4>\n

Relationships are built on trust and integrity. What does integrity mean? The word \u201cintegrity\u201d comes from the Latin integritatem<\/em><\/a>, meaning \u201csoundness\u201d or \u201cwholeness.\u201d\u00a0 Integrity is not situational – \u00a0it is a state of mind.\u00a0 In Covey\u2019s words…<\/p>\n

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\u201c\u00a0Integrity is conforming reality to our words \u2026 keeping promises and fulfilling expectations.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

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What does this look like in practice? Here are 7 musts to start with\u2026<\/h5>\n
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  1. Do the right thing for the right reasons and because it\u2019s the right thing to do <\/strong>\u2013 even if it is going to be unpopular with some people.<\/li>\n
  2. Face the truth and talk about it. <\/strong>This is the reality principle of \u201cseeing the world as it really is, and not as you wish it is\u201d.<\/em><\/li>\n
  3. Be upfront in your communication. <\/strong>People want to know where they stand and what is going on. People won\u2019t always like what they hear but they will value the adult-adult relationship.<\/li>\n
  4. Know you are sometimes wrong and that you sometimes make mistakes <\/strong>\u2013 and admit this.<\/li>\n
  5. Take responsibility for what you do and don\u2019t do.<\/strong><\/li>\n
  6. Put the needs of others before your own.<\/strong><\/li>\n
  7. Be loyal to those not present <\/strong>\u2013 confront gossiping, complaining and bad mouthing about people who aren\u2019t in the room.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
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